burgerkid:

when your friend starts telling an embarrassing story about you

image

(via pizza)

— 3 hours ago with 95156 notes

condesces:

what do we say to the god of death?

not today *sets difficulty to casual*

(via cuntsman-sniper)

— 3 hours ago with 7259 notes

helioscentrifuge:

my-songbird:

I don’t think I ever showed you guys this but we have a dog named Booker and this is his tag.

BOOKER, CATCH!

image

(via cuntsman-sniper)

— 3 hours ago with 14965 notes

oreimo:

offensed:

i wasn’t ready

I HATE THIS VIDEO I HATE THE INTERNET I HATE THE HUMAN RACE

(via cuntsman-sniper)

— 18 hours ago with 19743 notes
one-day-i-will-fall-asleep:

death-by-fangirling:

bronzedragon:

tomfelton-andthe-cumber-cocks:

strawberriesandjane:

funsizedfox:

“they won’t let me eat,wont let me sleep..”
“who?”
“…..them.”

Oh.

I AM CRYING

I remember reading about how EA was trying to sell the rights to make The Sims into a movie and everyone was like “…how?”
Now I get it
It’s a horror movie
People wake up one day to find themselves transformed into puppets of an invisible malicious trickster god
First the bizarre happenings start:
someone becomes obsessed with stealing lawn gnomes
another person has a compulsion to stick their head into a strange device and emerges obsessed by grilled cheese sandwiches
people pee themselves despite being next to a bathroom because some mysterious unseen force makes them study cleaning
people find themselves stuck in rooms because they can’t step over common household objects
a young man doing some nighttime stargazing mysteriously vanishes
then their god turns sadistic
pool ladders mysteriously vanish, leading to several drownings
doors vanish just as a house fire begins
an elevator plummets several stories as a couple starts to get it on
a Murphy Bed gruesomely folds up, crushing the people inside
and that man who vanished while stargazing returns…but with something growing inside of him…and vague memories of a grotesque creature named Pollination Technician
the horror has begun



I would pay a lot to watch that movie

one-day-i-will-fall-asleep:

death-by-fangirling:

bronzedragon:

tomfelton-andthe-cumber-cocks:

strawberriesandjane:

funsizedfox:

“they won’t let me eat,wont let me sleep..”

“who?”

“…..them.”

Oh.

I AM CRYING

I remember reading about how EA was trying to sell the rights to make The Sims into a movie and everyone was like “…how?”

Now I get it

It’s a horror movie

People wake up one day to find themselves transformed into puppets of an invisible malicious trickster god

First the bizarre happenings start:

someone becomes obsessed with stealing lawn gnomes

another person has a compulsion to stick their head into a strange device and emerges obsessed by grilled cheese sandwiches

people pee themselves despite being next to a bathroom because some mysterious unseen force makes them study cleaning

people find themselves stuck in rooms because they can’t step over common household objects

a young man doing some nighttime stargazing mysteriously vanishes

then their god turns sadistic

pool ladders mysteriously vanish, leading to several drownings

doors vanish just as a house fire begins

an elevator plummets several stories as a couple starts to get it on

a Murphy Bed gruesomely folds up, crushing the people inside

and that man who vanished while stargazing returns…but with something growing inside of him…and vague memories of a grotesque creature named Pollination Technician

the horror has begun

image

I would pay a lot to watch that movie

(via cuntsman-sniper)

— 2 days ago with 301696 notes